


Midlife Crisis

by desikauwa



Series: Tumblr Drabbles [18]
Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Batfamily Feels, Fluff, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-02
Updated: 2017-04-02
Packaged: 2018-10-14 02:32:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10527009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/desikauwa/pseuds/desikauwa
Summary: The last thing Jason would ever believe is Bruce having a midlife crisis. The man dresses up as a bat every night and punches people in the face after all.





	

**Author's Note:**

> this was a birthday gift for [hoth-damn](https://hoth-damn.tumblr.com/) on tumblr

Dick looked around the room. He couldn't remember a single time where three former Robins and one former Batgirl had been gathered in one place without some kind of crisis. That should have been his first hint about the situation.

"There is a crisis that must be handled immediately."

"Wow Demon Brat. You haven't even offered us a snack and you're already ordering us around."

Damian glared at Jason.

"Pennyworth has promised to bring snacks later. Right now, we can't afford niceties. This situation must be handled immediately."

Before anyone could ask Damian what he meant, he turned on the projector and started his presentation.

Said presentation turned out to be one on midlife crisis.

Tim started laughing hysterically because he was the only one who knew exactly what was going on.

"You've finally reached your limit with him."

Damian's face turned bright red with rage and Cassandra flicked Tim on his ear to get him to stop.

"Be nice. Let little brother explain."

"Yeah, I'd like Dami to explain what's going on."

Damian looked like he was ready to hug Dick and Cassandra but he kept himself restrained.

"Father is currently suffering through a midlife crisis. It must be stopped."

Jason burst out laughing.

"You're telling me the man who runs around at night beating people up is going through a midlife crisis. Give me break."

"I'm not joking Todd!"

Damian's face was red with rage but what really caused Jason to pause was when Tim spoke up.

"It's true. Bruce is acting like he's going through one."

Jason looked at Cassandra and Dick.

"Please tell me you don't believe them about this?"

Cassandra looked thoughtful before nodding.

"There must be some truth to their concerns."

Dick shrugged, "I have no reason not to believe them."

"Unbelievable." Jason threw up his hands and left.

There was no way the goddamn Batman was having a midlife crisis.

Unfortunately Jason was soon proven wrong when Bruce showed up at his door wearing the most ridiculous outfit he'd ever seen. Jason could have lived his entire life without ever finding out what Bruce looked like in an all leather outfit.

"What in the world are you wearing?"

Bruce smiled and Jason about ready to jump out the window.

"I need to borrow your bike. I trashed mine."

Jason stared at his adoptive father for a moment before… "No way in the multiverse am I lending you my bike." He then slammed the door in Bruce's face and texted the Wayne kids group chat that Dick and Cassandra kept adding him to.

**Jason:** I believe you. Bruce must be stopped.

**Dick:** waht was he weraing?

**Tim:** probs smthg scarring

**Jason:** Leather. Leather all over.

**Cassandra:** :)

**Damian:** Finally. Grayson send Todd the plan for an intervention.

As time progressed, the Wayne kids quickly discarded plan after plan before settling on forcing an intervention. For the world's greatest detective, Bruce was being incredibly dense about all the hints they were dropping.

Bruce was manhandled by Cassandra into a room. He never could say no to his daughter.

Cassandra forced Bruce down into a chair and he glanced around at his five children.

"What's up guys?"

A collective shudder went around the room at Bruce's casual tone. Jason was especially disturbed.

"Damian turn on the presentation."

"Don't tell me what to do Todd." Damian snapped as he went to do just that.

Dick laughed lightly while Tim shook his head in exasperation.

When the presentation about midlife crisis showed up, Bruce started laughing.

"I wondered how long you boys would take to figure out I was pretending to have one."

There was instant clamoring before Cassandra let out a sharp whistle.

"Bruce has been pretending for outsiders. Told me weeks ago."

Her brothers stared at her as she nodded to Bruce and left the room. Alfred had asked for her help today.

**Author's Note:**

> i can be found on [tumblr](http://desikauwa.tumblr.com/)


End file.
